>> Catching up..

Posted in General on June 11, 2008 by AJ

Been ages since I’ve last posted. Thought I’d do some catching up. Stuff’s keeping me busy, well that seems like an excuse; just haven’t sat down to really post something of late. Well, this is my first blog post from another country. Life’s been good, I’m in the University of Michigan right now sitting at home in my apartment. Been here for a month and have another month left. A nice summer vacation bundled with interesting work. It’s not the first time I’ve been living alone but probably the first time I’m staying alone and managing almost everything I need on my own. Including food, house, travel, shopping, et al. I think it’s a great experience - drop you in the middle of some place and expect yourself to carry on as normally as you can. i didn’t have much time to actually *prepare* for my trip as I left 3 days after I came back from college. But that added to the fun! Frantic last minute shopping, figuring out the best stuff to take, learning the basic survival tips (including playing chef). However, it was all just observe and grasp. Never actually tried all the stuff back at home. My experimentations began 8,000 miles away. It was good to be back in a place I had spent my initial life in. Was great seeing my old school and house and actually being able to remember some of the routes and landmarks! Lot has happened in the last month, many things learnt and experienced. Most importantly the ability to be more independent than ever before.

I have seen the majority of this land and there really isn’t much left for me to sight see, so I love to relax at home, waste time and generally relax. Work isn’t much of a pressure, it’s going really well and is very interesting as well and that makes me head to uni everyday eagerly! I doubt that would ever happen back at home. Given a chance to bunk, I would bunk the entire semester probably. Just like I observe on my forums, it is great to see a place that is run so well - at such a large level. I think controlling 70k members is quite a large task. But as long as everyone follows the rules, all is well. That’s pretty much the way it works here. Traffic and driving is an absolute pleasure. You will always see people following the lane discipline, even though there are 3 lanes on the expressways with 2 shoulders, you won’t see people speeding down the shoulders overtaking everyone. Even though there may be a gap just enough to squeeze a small car through two lanes in a jam, you won’t see anyone doing it. You won’t see anyone jumping a red light even if it’s in the middle of the night and there’s no one on the adjacent roads. Add to it - there isn’t anyone monitoring you. It’s in the system, if you are taught and made to understand then you’ll never lose it. I wish some of these things would be observed and taken in in our country. One of my friends over here commented that “it’s so chaotic all the time over there!” referring to the traffic at home. And I couldn’t agree less.

Well, what is happening. Technology is awesome, makes the world a tiny tiny place. It’s really intriguing to visualize that there is actually a person like you sitting on the other side of the planet also with an open browser with gmail looking at the exact screen that you have and typing something and chatting with you. Although it’s something that we do everyday - something that *seems* so so simple, look deeper into it. I’m at home, sitting on a couch, no wires nothing. With a comp on my lap connected to the internet. There is *something* all around me, some kinda invisible field that allows me to communicate with the outside world. This travels all the way around the planet and there is someone else just like me sitting someplace and we both are conversing in real time.

I’m not sure but how many of you actually put a face to that ‘ping’ you get on gmail, to every message you receive, to every smilie that you give or receive? Do you just do it for the sake of it or can we truly visualize being in conversation with her/him? They say when you are online the boundaries are far less. Perhaps but isn’t it kinda meaningless to just randomly talk with a computer? I mean to someone you really don’t know and probably never will! Pen friends and random buddies apart - I’ve made some really good ones over the past years and I am gonna meet em. Last month I met someone that I’ve known for over a year - purely online. And it was just awesome catching up. We have never hung out before, never seen each other and actually never heard each others’ voices either. But when we actually met up, it was like we had known each other for ages! I guess that’s some of the good stuff about this. Plenty of arbit disadvantages, et al that we all know about and is cliched so I have no interest in writing about all that. Use what ya got in a proper way should apply to all.

Oh yeah, I wanted to write a bit about what we call ‘internet slang’. Most o u gyz wud no it as smthng lik dis. cum on! is der relly ny sens n writn stuf in such a wy?? For a long time now, I have completely stopped using this kinda ‘leet’ or chat language, abbreviations in every kinda electronic communication. If i could, I would start a battle against this nonsense! I absolutely hate it! In the beginning I too thought it was kewl and da nex bes ting. But as I grew, thoughts changed and from an outsiders view, not only does it look completely totally senseless and unprofessional, sometimes it’s pretty difficult to read as well. It took me much more time to think about the first few sentences in this paragraph and type it in. I believe this was initially called ‘chat’ language. And something that was used so that we could get across messages faster than normal and for it to seem like a normal conversation. I’m not too against that, almost everyone I know uses abbreviations and chat talk when I talk to them. But, come on - in emails?! How many years can someone go on using chat language?

I’m pretty darn sure that they must be good typers by now. I never learnt typing, I just got used to it, I used to post a lotta things, type in posts, replies in forums, send emails and of course chat quite a a bit. Gradually I got better at it and am pretty amazed that many people ask me how I type so well and pretty fast too (not showing off :P). I’m not the fastest typer either, I average around maybe 60-70 words per minute. With accuracy taken into account. It’s just practise and probably a will to not use internet slang. If you chat with me, you’d probably notice (or probably not notice, who knows..) that I use perfect punctuation, spelling (unless I don’t know the spelling) as well. And that’s faster than someone who writes in shorthand, with poor spelling and punctuation! Hehe.. Oh well, I’m just venting I guess. Go ahead, use internet slang to the full! But please not in stuff apart from chat! Imagine how blogs would look in chat language? It’s horrendous, I’ve actually seen them. Who cares about the content if the presentation sucks? No body.

On the forums where I moderate we have a strict no internet slang rule that we enforce very strictly. Whenever I see a new poster who posts in such a manner immediately I get the impression of a 14-13 year old kid, with low interest who’s on the boards and offering or asking for advice. You will not believe how much a post presentation and display tells about a user. I’m very used to it and it’s probably one of the reasons why sometimes I over analyze somethings while chatting. You may actually type something in a particular way on purpose, but I’m not used to this digression and it pokes at me! At times it could be the difference between a ‘ya’ and a ‘Yeah’. Or the two periods that many of us use after each and every line - I actually love those, they intrigue me *grin*. You know.. I mean.. I wonder what this could mean.. leaves you in a weird thought state.. what’s happening.. what is he/she thinking.. why.. ok, I’ll stop it! Ha! Get the point? It’s probably second nature to the poster but not to me!

Just remember, clarity of thought and expression can get us places. Well addressed correspondence, well composed stuff, well thought of writings, and plenty more like that really make a difference. I’ve experienced it and it’s not just a random thing that I think. I’ve thought certain things were impossible. But careful, clear thoughts paved out a path and it eventually came to light. I hope that path continues to shine bright and goes in the direction I want it to.

First step - kill the internet slang guyz! Ha! j/k.. Until next time ;)

The word impossible is reserved for those without an imagination


Peace.

>> Inspiration… the lack of it?

Posted in General on April 10, 2008 by AJ

Been pretty busy the past couple of days and while I’m doing a bunch of stuff on other blogs, I’m not finding the time to actually blog! Well, something has been going on of late. Something to do with inspiration and passion. What’s been going on? In a couple of words - there’s a lack of it. I really don’t know why. Maybe it was just an initial fire, an initial flame? Is the flame dying? Does it want to be extinguished? That’s actually a tough choice to make. While one part of me wants to keep it going on forever and ever, another part starts to creep in and say just let it go, what’s the point, what are you gonna get outta this, why do you need this, what’s all this for? All those questions actually make sense to me and in a way maybe it’s not required. This probably all sounds really vague. Let’s take an example. I performed after a really long time 2 days back. I love to perform, I love to enjoy and entertain. 3 years back, I was on a roll. I would be ready to do it anytime to anyone, anyplace. I had SO much energy, so much vigor, so much fire and passion inside me. But now, I’m not sure whether that has reduced or whether it has just evolved to something else. Back to 2 days back. It felt awesome to do something like that again, gave me such a rush, the feeling was great, I was on cloud 9. I started getting messages about it right after I was done with it and boy, it felt great. Truly. It feels awesome to be congratulated for something, feel noticed. When everything else around you is a blur, there’s something in the haze that stands out and makes you smile all the time. Makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Standing in front of a huge crowd, getting them into it, making them feel what I want them to feel, suspending their disbelief, and making them believe that anything is possible. This gave me enough of whatever it was to want to do something more. I did after a few hours and once again the feeling was great. The reactions afterwards and responses were all bang on target and exactly as envisioned. A near perfect performance.

What made me go ahead with this? It was actually a last minute decision taken on my part. One year ago, I worked my butt off for a couple of months to set up a 45 minute show. I used to stay up almost every night, make calls, routine, brainstorm, chat, script and rehearse. A year ago, I hoped I would return the next year. Unfortunately, the year happened to be a rather busy one and I could not commit myself. But the feeling never left me and I knew I wanted to go back. Hence the last minute dive into the field. I had learnt a lot in one year. I knew not to accept an offer without being ready for it, I knew not to go out and give less than 100%. But I needed to do this, not because I wanted to but because others wanted me to. That was a driving force. That was my inspiration. YOU guys are my inspiration. Without YOU, there would be no magic. These days it’s taking a tremendous amount of effort to get me inspired. Why? What’s wrong and what’s happening? Why is the fire inside me burning out? I don’t know how to oil it and keep it running. I look back a year, 2 years and think about them. I used to visit so many places on a regular basis, I used to talk to so many people, I used to keep in touch with people far away, I used to perform like crazy, I used to stay up doing unorthodox stuff. All because I loved them. Today, it’s changed. While everything is still the same, I have changed. Or who knows, maybe they have as well. Let’s take a couple of examples. There is a place online where I was immensely active; I used to make friends almost every day. I still visit the place, but it’s just different. No longer fancy, no longer as appealing as it was before. Is it because I am all the way at the top or is it because I find it boring? I truly hope it isn’t the latter because I love what I do. People would do so much to want to be in such a position of power on a forum. I still don’t know why I was picked. Everyone said that I should be there, and I am happy they think so. But nowadays, the drive to do it is less. It just doesn’t make sense. Just like I said in the beginning.. something says I should possibly let it go. I try my best to wholeheartedly disagree with that, but the force is getting more and more stronger. However, I’m glad that still a lotta people look upto me, I get messages every day from youngsters getting into the art. My messenger is always open for chat and it’s cool to help someone out. Just like I was helped out when I started. I had a few guys who took me under their wing and guided me. They did TONS. Made videos, sent files, scripts, guides, anything and everything. I guess I need more people like that to inspire me.

Does distance do a lot to relationships and friendships? I think yes. It makes it super tough. How is it possible to keep the same rapport over a virtual world where the only visualization is in letters and pictures and text? It’s just not the same. Time flies and pretty soon you figure out that you’re discussing the same old boring stuff over and over again. How many times can you go, “Hey, what’s up?” and get a reply much different than, “Nothing much really. Just hanging around” ? Hardly ever. Is it indifference by the other person, or is it just a cliché that nobody really wants to reply anything else? Personally, when someone asks me that, I know that they usually they need someone to talk to, or need someone to listen or probably just wanna catch up. Why limit the conversation to a ‘nothing much’ when I have all this in mind? Seems kinda mean doesn’t it? (If you know me well, you’ll probably know that I hate meanness). Well, maybe there really isn’t anything to talk about? No – there is always something to talk about, and you are always doing something and that’s why you’ll usually never catch me replying “nothing much” to a “what’s up” call. Unless of course I don’t want to be disturbed or I am put away by the person itself (which is very rare). But in that case I would say it directly. All it takes is a few extra taps on your keyboard to shed that indifference and give a nice reply. Or am I just being way overjudgmental? Wow, it looks like I have digressed a whole lot. Let’s get this a little back on course.

It takes a mammoth effort to continue to do something over and over again without getting bored. Have a look at a show performer or an actor in a play. They must’ve rehearsed a huge ton load of times. They must actually be sick of what they’re doing and saying. But can they show it? No, they can’t. And do they show it? No, they don’t because they aren’t sick of it. They love doing what they’re doing and as long as that is there, all is well. In the initial stages, a person performs because he loves it a lot, he finds it cool and he enjoys the reactions he gets. While that’s alright for a starter, a more intermediate or advanced artist will perform not only because he loves it, but because he knows the feeling that a spectator will get when he/she comes across something like this. For you, it’s the 10 billionth time that you are performing. But for them – it’s the first time they’re seeing something so amazing and awesome. Example time. Same effect performed for 10 different groups of people. Is there a difference between what you did for the first group and the last? Is there a difference in your attitude or emotion? Most probably yes. Is there a difference in the spectators? No, they all share the commonality that they’re all seeing what you are doing for the first time. Each group has the same amount of energy. Each group has the same kinda people. Even you are the same. The only thing that changes is your ability and want to perform/entertain. You have to love your audience, you have to love the people around you. Give them all you got. I’ve inspired SO many people who were on the verge of quitting to come back in and not let go. A few have left and well, maybe they were better off doing it, but many have actually come back. They’re attracted back by a feeling of ‘home’. Do we need a break? I’m trying my best not to take break, because I don’t want to lose touch. I don’t know how long it will take to adjust when I return. Many take some time off, and they say it was great. Great for them, but I missed them.

Do you all really love what you do? Are you doing what you wanna really do? I know I am not. But I am also doing what I love to do but not doing only what I love to do. I guess the latter is asking for a bit too much eh? Should we take the road less traveled? I definitely think so. That’s what I really want to do. That’s where I can see my path, that’s what is calling out to me. What I don’t want to happen is to lose interest in what I love. That can only happen because of external factors. And I want to eliminate those factors.

Here’s what I need. I need inspiration, I need something/someone to relight this fire of passion, I need to get back in time and get myself in that person’s shoes and relive those moments. Recently I read an article by one of my close pals on inspiration. He had absolutely no inspiration to write an article that he needs to do every week. But he had to. An easy excuse would be that there was no inspiration. But, that’s chickening out, an excuse. Here’s what he did. He sat down and forced himself to write. There’s no point in waiting for inspiration, you have to go looking for it, you have to run after it, you need to go catch it and grab it! And that’s something like what he wrote that day. It was a beautiful piece and gave me some inspiration. I wanted to write something tonight but didn’t have anything much to write about (I thought). But I forced myself to, I got myself inspired to do that instead of waiting endlessly for it to come to me (it may not have). That’s why I’m here at 1am waiting to complete this. Wanting to finish this. I wish the same things happen for a lot of the other things going on now as well. I hope the fire is re-lit, I hope that I can continue with the fervor I once had for them. I’ll definitely need some help. I’ll need to search and dig deep. And there are things and people I look upto for that. Get me back on track buddy, set me on fire, burn me and keep me hot. In the end, I know it’s upto me. The real inspiration comes from within us. That’s the one that will keep us self sustaining.

My head is overflowing with thoughts. I still think I could go on and on for a few more pages but I don’t think anyone would actually read it. I came in here late at night to write. I achieved that goal. I got inspiration to write something. No, that’s not true. I inspired myself to write something and I did. Had I waited, I would have been in my room and slept off. Now it is time to sign off. Until next time..

Build a man a fire, and he’ll be warm for a day. SET a man on fire and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.


Peace.

>> Randomness…

Posted in General on March 28, 2008 by AJ

A while back a couple of us were discussing some changes on how to run the place where I spend most of my time online. Being one of the world’s best managed forums, you can tell that it got pretty intense. I know almost all the top guys in there very well and have known them for quite a bit now. We’re like one big close knit family. We help each other out, talk among ourselves, enquire about life, talk about family, plans, etc, etc. Not just limited to magic. But you know, occasionally there are a few disagreements in this virtual world and you seem to be caught in the middle of it. Two parties getting on each other, both who you know extremely well, both really close to you. What do you do? Try to bring peace or wait till one shoots the other down? It’s a tough call really because I can see both sides of the issue, and I agree with both of them (most of the time, or atleast I understand why one doesn’t agree with the other). Sometimes it’s just best to agree to disagree. Once that’s done, it’s nearly settled.

Another thing I realize is that once the dust settles, once all is calm, when we try and analyze our relationship it seems to have been strengthened for some reason. A much stronger bond than what existed before. It’s like the misunderstanding actually brought us closer together. Gained some valuable experience from it, earned each other’s respect (oh, of course unless it was real messy but ya know, we conduct ourselves in a very professional manner.. hehe). True, there may have been a little name calling, maybe a bit more on the personal front, a mini battle of words as well. (They do say the pen is mightier than the sword). Looking back though, do we really want those fights? Do we want those hard feelings? Definitely not. But as long as we bring out any problem in a proper way and in a respectable manner, all is well. There have been a few similar incidents in the past. Where I’ve believed even saying such stuff would result in a horrible catastrophe, tensions, arguments, expelling. But it didn’t. And that’s because who ever was responsible for it brought it up in the right way. And that person earned immense respect from me for that. We’re now very open in various areas with each other. It may seem pretty surprising that all this happens on a regular basis - online. But it’s true. And it really is awesome. We run a huge house. A house filled with people from all over the world, all ages and types. It’s a place that I go to almost everyday. Even if I don’t do much on a particular day, I’ll be sure to pop in and maybe check if stuff is well. A private sanctuary, filled with people that you know you can talk with and know that there’ll always be someone to listen to you. Anytime of the day. That’s the kind of passion and love we have for this place. It all started out with a desire to amaze, but I got more than that. I moved up the ranks, learnt a lot, shared a lot and it happens every day over and over again. Over the years, I’ve made some of the best friends online. Some of these are even closer than people I’ve actually met and move around with. Maybe one day we’ll all be able to meet up. It’s an extraordinary world, filled with extraordinary people. For me, magic has brought me closer to people, allowed me to get smiles on people’s faces, help others, and on my side - have an amazing time!

I was talking to one person a few weeks back. He was asking me how things were. Well, it was cpc time then and the explanation of it continued with me telling him that it wasn’t really something that important. He replied to me, “It all matters. It is a way for you to test out yourself. Just like a rehearsal for a magic show. Magic is everywhere my friend and the principles you learn from magic will go a long way in the real world - even if you don’t perform magic.” That made so much sense to me and coming from a man who’s experienced it all, good in life, a great performer, a great friend, I know his words are 100% true. That’s just a small example. Another thing would be to look for flaws in things. Take a website. We have exceptionally high standards for our place and I’ve learnt that even tiny things like font inconsistencies and minor sizing differences make all the difference. Everything else on the site may look brilliant but that small thingamajig will stand out like an eyesore. It may not but why let it go? That’s a reason why sometimes it’s pretty upsetting for me to see and look around websites of top people/companies/anything on the web and start noticing defects. I am just a lay person, I don’t know much. But what’s the point in having such a large awesome place when simple words are mispelt or there are broken links or typos? (you’ll find a lot of these things on government websites). Isn’t the content of a website one of the most important things? Oh well, looks like I’ve ranted about randomness a bit too much today! But I don’t worry. Because writing is another thing I love doing. It’s what I do most of the time I am online. Post threads, replies, offer support, et al. And of course occasionally try to write something that makes sense, *grin*.

I’ll finish with something I was fooling around with recently. I was experimenting with a little effect with my cards. Trying to work out an interesting presentation for it. I worked off an idea from one of S-Y’s lecture notes. He called it something on the lines of “The effect without an explanation”. The effect is structured in such a way so as to resolve all doubt at all stages. There isn’t much ’suspense’ within the routine because at each and every stage you are told what is going to happen, what is happening and what you are doing! But I thought this throws open a new kind of entertainment element in performance. Is this still suspense? What causes us to still be amazed when everything concludes, even though we already know what is going to happen? Maybe it’s the amazement that comes from the magic being nearly perfect. Maybe it’s the entertaining presentation. I say ‘near’ perfect because nothing is perfect. Every effect has its flaw, it’s how we cover up these flaws that shows how good we are. But certainly some of the stuff out there does really look like real magic (read: Copperfield, Cyril). And you may think that such an effect may not actually get the reactions I described. But that’s not true because I performed this to someone last week and I am pretty sure that they found it interesting and intriguing. Maybe not the exact target reaction I was aiming for but nevertheless entertained, which was a primary goal as well. I shall stop here for now. The lab is cold, my nose is running, and my tummy is rumbling.

Magic lives in a lawless world. And in that world, exists the extraordinary - From the FS trailer.


Peace.

>> Pragyan ‘08

Posted in General on March 7, 2008 by AJ

Been a while since I penned down something. Pragyan 08 just finished and I basically just finished having a great time. Well, here are a few highlights of what I was upto. I spent a lot of unnecessary cash on food thanks to the occasional non-functionality of the charging card feature. And of course me being hungry only when that happened. Apart from that I was the ‘Qaos’ in charge of 3 separate events - the details of which I will not go into! As for the technical side of my activities, a couple of us built a roller coaster outta wooden sticks, a long tube, plenty of thread and tape. It looked pretty wacky and we thought we had a nice setup with a cool loop and an anti-gravity upwards section. The first few trial runs with an oversized ball failed but with the smaller ball it rocked. Apparently the judges didn’t think so, heh. The second day’s problem was brilliant. We had to make an automatic bowler (a device which throws a ball to hit the wickets). Once again, we had an idea par excellence. Oh so we thought. While everyone used the standard catapult mechanism, we decided to try something crazy. A launcher which would propel the ball forwards with tremendous force. Think of it like an oversized snooker cue. Our cue was a wooden ruler which would be pulled back and then let go to strike the ball. With many more modifications for area of contact, power, aim, stability and all the usual stuff. And then came the trials again. Unfortunately I wasn’t there to witness my teams demonstration but I heard it was hilarious. The first two shots missed because of aim. We nailed the maximum score possible on a single shot the last time. However.. here’s what actually happened mechanism wise. The ruler was pulled back, ball placed on a small support in front of it. Ruler let go. Ruler hits ball - ball flies - ruler flies - support (consisting of a small Fevicol bottle, a leaf bowl and some more arbit stuff) flies - ALL hit the wickets! The complete launcher, well - launched! Afterwards during dinner I got whacked and thumped with my own launcher. You ungrateful teammates, Hmmpf!

The other thing I was ‘actively’ involved in (apart from Qaos..) was the daily Pragyan Times paper. I got dragged in for the fact that I knew some photoshop and they were a couple of people short. However, I did learn a lot about it, got more flexible with it and was able to give my best shot the 2 days I worked with them. It was great fun although I did nitpick a lot! (I always do when it comes to these kinda things). On the last day I finally got the whole font set changed to Verdana (Yay!). Times New Roman sucks - it’s got too many serifs, it’s cramped and sore on the eyes. While Arial is alright, it’s a bit cramped as well and spacing isn’t great. Verdana looks professional, great on the eyes, good spacing, good script (Akshay if you’re reading this - yes it does look like I will be bugging you about this till the time we graduate, mwhaha!). There were a few goof ups but we tried our best to be perfect.

In the end, it was an enjoyable event, I learnt quite a few things, did a bunch of things I’ve always wanted to do, tried new crazy stuff. And ate a lot. A bit late to advertise it but here goes - http://www.pragyan.org/

Peace.

>>Travel Woes

Posted in General on February 24, 2008 by AJ

When I originally wrote this I was feeling EXTREMELY frustrated about it. I’ve tweaked it around a bit though now and therefore there may not be consistency in tone! For those who know me well, you know that traveling and myself don’t really go too well with each other. Been like that for a long time! So my latest ‘adventure’ happened on my trip home from college on Friday.

I decided to head home because there was hardly anyone left in hostel this weekend and my usual weekend getaway at Trichy wasn’t available. Add to it, it was a pretty long day for me with plenty of bursts of emotions and irritation. My planning for a trip also sucks big time so this I decided to book my return tickets first - I still hadn’t decided when/how to go home in the first place. Got those set properly and finally made plans to catch a night bus home. Headed to CBS with a friend and as usual we were thronged by agents who promised a good journey. Since we reached only at 21:30 and needed to have something to munch on the 22:00 state bus would be too much of a gamble. So, we gave in to one of these agents. He promised us an A/C bus, seats 5 and 6 for Rs200. I actually thought it was a pretty good deal. But then - we saw what was in store for us. A random bus. And seats in the middle. And no A/C. But oh well, it was getting late and we decided to take it on the promise that it would leave only after we ate at around 22:15. Had a quick bite and returned. It was then that we noticed 2 more of my friends on the same bus and they claimed that the bus was supposed to leave at 21:30! Quite a shock. Well.. it finally started at 23:30. It went straight to the petrol bunk where it stalled. I sensed a dead battery as the lights blew, the TV (which was playing some of the crappiest crap ever) shut off. We waited and waited. People started pushing it from the back (it was like sitting in this huge rocking cradle) for around 15 minutes. Finally - it started. We were off by 12. The guy who was driving was a maniac. Middle of the night sometime (I was awake, couldn’t sleep) there was a halt in the side of the road. Some guy came and started quarreling with this driver. Never before have I heard such horrible language, my ears would’ve literally bled. I don’t understand why people need to say such things in order to come to an agreement. That too grown ups. Personally I never swear. The maximum you may catch me at would be ‘crap’ or rarely ’sh**’. Just saddens me that such crazy things happen.

Think it’s over? Nope! Around 70km from home sweet home, we stopped. Again. This time it was either a fuel loss, puncture, God knows what! Our patience was tested enough, we got off as soon as we saw another bus halt in front of us. Spent the next 45 minutes standing, sleepy, tired, wasted. Thankfully, we were able to sit down for the last 10 minutes. I reached home at around 10am. Whew, what a mess. I guess ya’ll must’ve had similar experiences sometime, and this is just one of my many. Far too many perhaps.

Now comes the important part. For all those of you guys reading this, NEVER, EVER alight on a bus which says SSCM Travels. You’ll regret it. Be sure to pass this message onto everyone you know! This may seem a bit funny but in seriousness it really wasn’t. However looking back, I just take it as another experience. Have had far worse but that will be saved for another day.

Peace.

>> Specialness and Magicalness

Posted in General on February 16, 2008 by AJ

Are we all special? Most definitely yes. What makes us special? Each one of us has something that surpasses anything that is ‘common’. We got something exceptional. Something that makes us distinct among others. But, what is it? That’s tough for me to say without knowing you. But I know for a fact that every person I’ve met in my life is special. They have this ‘thing’ in them. You may not know about it maybe because we are too modest to accept it or look at it. If I know you I’ll gladly tell you why I think YOU are special. Try looking at it from the outside. Think back and try to remember the last 10 distinct people that you spoke to, met, interacted with. Were they all the same? I’m pretty sure not. What made them separate, apart - special? It can be anything. From their charming attitude, the way the control a person, the way they talk, a particular skill, a feeling you get when you’re around them, the feeling you get when they leave. Literally anything - but something distinct - something that is unique to them. But why am I talking about this? Once again, these are just thoughts that come to my mind at random times. Some things that I think about. Some things that maybe others would like to think about. If you’re feeling down, upset, sad or just not in a good mood, think about yourself. Think about how many people love you and feel that your special. Think about how many people you love and feel are special as well. Get that feeling into yourself that you’re awesome. Each one of us IS and should feel proud about it.

Now I could take this to a slightly higher emotion level and say we’re all ‘magical’. I actually prefer this! It’s like being special on steroids. Let me take a small diversion (as always) over here. When performing a little routine for someone, when you’re demonstrating a little card trick, there are so many things involved in it to make it look good. To give your audience a special experience; rather a magical experience. See the difference? It is actually just 3 letters. There are many things in the world that are special like I’ve already said. Take it further, blow it out of this world and you get magic. Twist reality, blur the line, drive them to the very edge and then take them over it. They already know that they’re experiencing something very special once they come to the edge. Jump over it together and you experience the magic when you realize that you’re flying. What I am talking about is very broad - it can be a person, thing, event, a mystery, a thought, anything! So till next time like I say sometimes - “Stay Magical”.

One way can be learned by starting to see the magic in everything. Sometime it seems to be hiding but it is always there. The more we can see the magic in one thing, a tiny flower, a mango, someone we love, then the more we are able to see the magic in everything and in everyone. Where does the mango stop and the sky begin?


Peace.

>> Dreams and Imagination

Posted in General on February 6, 2008 by AJ

Do our dreams mean anything? Do we dream at all? I dream loads. I enjoy dreaming and it’s something that I’ve loved doing for the past couple of years. It’s not something to do only while we’re fast asleep. I think dreams and imagination go together. Imagination is amazing, it opens up a whole new dimension, a whole new area, a whole new world where YOU govern everything. You are the master of your own world. We create and steer the ship of our universe. Now I know these thoughts may seem a bit abstract to some (if not many) but I know some will be able to appreciate them. There’s a difference between merely fantasizing and actually dreaming, visualizing and emotionalizing anything. Anything can be anyone’s fantasy. That doesn’t necessarily mean they really want it. If we really want something, we can definitely get it. I got proof and it’s happened to me before. I’ll give you a little example. (All this has nothing to do with religion even though I am going to be using the word ‘faith’)

What is faith? To me it’s the belief in something. It can be a person, thing, an incident, or even something we believe in. There is no need of any kind of logical proof. Everyone has different kinds of faith. Religion is one of them but I am not going to talk about that. When we board an airplane, we have faith that it is going to land again safely. If we didn’t have such a belief, we wouldn’t have even boarded it in the first place. It’s this weird ‘faith’ that drives us. It’s this ‘faith’ which can actually make things happen. It’s with faith, imagination, dreams, emotions, visualization that I believe anything is possible. It’s a pretty big thing what I just said, but look at it carefully and perhaps there may actually be a bit of truth in it? Has anything impossible ever happened to you? Why do you think it happened? I’m not a very strong believer in ‘fate’ because like I said before - I think we’re responsible for anything and everything that happens to us. Be it good, be it bad.

A small deviation into my other dimension of magic and mystery. A trick went amazingly well, we got the reactions we dreamed about, everything went according to plan, we can take full credit for it, right? Absolutely. Next, a different scenario; nothing went like we planned, our spectators got too suspicious, they started seeing things that shouldn’t have been seen, they started asking things that shouldn’t have been asked and which you couldn’t answer. I’d say we just got a real tough cookie or a heckler and any poor chap who’d been in our place would have had an equally horrid time, right? Wrong. WE were responsible for everything that happened. If nothing went like we planned, we didn’t plan enough; if the spectators got too suspicious, we didn’t resolve enough doubt; if they started seeing or asking things that shouldn’t have been asked, then we didn’t convince them enough and failed in our goal to entertain them. Finally we failed right at the initial judgment. Failed in establishing a proper rapport and trust. We didn’t get heckled - we created the heckler. And that’s why we should must take complete responsibility for it.

How we can extend this into any other facet of life is upto us. It’s very simple to do and I’ll leave that to you. Did you notice that right in the beginning of the description of the positive scenario I said, “we got the reactions we dreamed about…”? It’s not just a dream that got us there. Remember it’s not just a fantasy. If you think that I can dream about something and just go out there and do it, it’s not going to happen. That’s a fantasy. I can fantasize about winning a Formula 1 Grand Prix. It doesn’t mean that if given a chance to drive tomorrow I will win. That’s because it’s just a fantasy, nothing more. A proper visualization or dream has clarity and is filled with emotions. It will drive you to work towards it. It will show you the path to follow and you can start your journey. Couple it with some imagination and your dream improves, you set the bar higher, you raise standards and in the end the results will be amazing. I assure you and have faith in that. Turn your fantasies into reality. You know the way to do it.

Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.


Peace.

>> Trust, Rapport and my Universe

Posted in General on February 1, 2008 by AJ

I’m in a real happy mood tonight and the going is slow and so is the internet ’superhighway’. I thought, why not update the blog! The past few days have had their ups and downs, and looking back at all that has happened, I’m glad things have settled down. When our minds are overflowing with thoughts, what’s the best thing to do? Do we share them, express them to the open, or keep them inside and allow them to build up? I’m not sure and I guess it varies from person to person as well as the stuff that’s going through our heads and for me I base it on trust. What is this trust? How do we know if we can trust someone? I’ve known people for years together and still wouldn’t trust them in a lot of things. On the other hand, I’ve also known people for under a year, a couple of weeks or days and feel that I can share so much. What causes this to happen? Is it some kind of mental connection or wavelength matching? I think trust is a very powerful feeling/emotion and once you’re sure about it with someone or regarding something, it’s like a whole new part of yourself opens up and flows out.

While performing one of the most important aspects is the establishment of rapport and trust. Now why is this essential in magic? Magic is after all trying to fool the spectator, hide what you’re doing and make sure you aren’t exposed - right? No, atleast that’s not the way I see it. A couple of hours back I had a chance to read a story that was shared by one of the members on our boards on how magic had affected his life. It was a deeply moving read and I’ll link it below. To me magic isn’t about making sure I come out successful in the end, successfully ‘fooling’ my audience. That’s why trust is important. The earlier and more effectively you are able to establish this trust the better the experience you and your spectator share. It no longer remains a twisted contorted puzzling labryinthal hunt for the method. It becomes something totally different. But what? I’m trying to setup a show for later this year. Thinking a TON about it these days. It’s gonna be something I’ve never tried before. Something totally new, stuff I’m not sure whether will work or not. My goal is to attempt to play with emotions. Evoke a much deeper emotional response. If you’ve seen Copperfield perform, you’ll notice that many of his effects have something more than just a large illusion or a bunch of difficult moves. I won’t spoil the fun for those who haven’t seen him so if you get a chance, definitely have a look at his videos (or of course go to his show!). This isn’t just the case in performing. When you see someone for the first time, isn’t it great when you get that feeling of mutual trust or emotional affinity? I think those first impressions are what matter most in any relationship, encounter, acquaintance, gathering, et al. Maybe that’s the reason for me having different opinions about people I’ve known for different periods of times. Contrary to the standard trust being proportional to how well/long you know someone. I think it’s all intriguing and interesting. (Click here for the link to the story)

I didn’t want to make another post on the technical sides of magic so let’s steer this ship back on course! So, what’s keeping me happy? I’m really not sure. I just feel glad that I got awesome people around me, great things to do, great stuff to work with and so much to think about. Our universe is created by US and how it turns out is how we build it. It’s ALL in our thoughts. If we want something we will get it, I can promise you that. I want to be in a world that is always happy, with happy people around, people I can trust, fantastic things to do, great things to share, and plenty of good food. Erm, the last one was just a addition that came about because of the recent trends in the things I am forced to eat! Anyways, I already live in that universe. I got most of the things I want and what I don’t, I am just continuing to build and will continue to do so. I think the most important element in my universe are friends. Can’t exist without them, I don’t know who can?! Of course friends aren’t my whole life - it’s friends that make my life whole. It’s a pretty small statement but I love it and it’s so true. I thought I could be a bit more organized in this post but it seems like I’ve just gone all over the place writing all kinds of stuff. Oh well, I hope whoever reads this enjoys it, and till next time - keep smiling!

:)

Dance like nobody’s watching, sing like nobody’s listening, love as if you’ve never been hurt and live as if heaven is on earth.

Peace.

>> Astonishment and Trivialization

Posted in General on January 20, 2008 by AJ

I’m focusing a bit on magic and the stuff I love doing in this post. I don’t perform to to make people look like fools, to make myself look more popular, or superior. I perform because I love performing and want people to have a good time. My goals are simple. What is this feeling of “Astonishment”? Take a new born baby. To it, everything it sees or experiences is new. It looks at everything in awe and amazement. Even something as simple as a ball or a TV. Why don’t we feel that same sense of astonishment that the baby feels? It’s because we know the working behind it. It’s not impressive to us. Anymore.

Magic brings back this sense of wonder and astonishment in people. Seeing something unbelievable, something with no explanation; it takes them back to their childhood days and the times when anything and everything amazed them. It really is a great feeling. And that is the feeling I try to bring about in my spectators whenever I perform. It’s not easy, but I’m getting there! I’ve seen it happen so many times - your eyes brighten up, you smile, laugh, chuckle, gasp, et al when a card does something impossible, when something switches places, when something awesome happens in THEIR hands. It’s not only a great feeling for YOU but for ME as well. Magicians live because of their audience. Without YOU, there would be no magic.

A lotta times people want to know how I do what I do. How does it work, how do you make that happen, what’s the secret behind x, y and z? Can you do ‘real’ magic? Well, let me tell you this. You know that feeling of astonishment and wonder you got when you were seeing it? The very second you figure out how it happened, you’ll lose that awesome feeling. Trust me - I’ve seen it happen and believe me it’s better for you to just sit back an enjoy the experience… I don’t perform ‘real’ magic, I don’t have any superpowers, I can just perhaps let you suspend your disbelief for a period of time. Take you to the very edge and blow reality.

There are many things that the newer guys to the field make a mistake about. They learn something and just get out and perform. Without giving it the time it deserves, without working on the aspects apart from the handling and sleights. As a result the magic is trivialized. Now… what is this trivialization? I’ll get to that. Who doesn’t like solving puzzles? Almost everyone does especially if it’s given to them. Let’s say I give you a puzzle to think about, ponder and break your head over. You can’t solve it and when you come to me I refuse to give you the solution. Wouldn’t that totally bum you out? Here’s what I’m coming at - magic isn’t meant to be presented as a puzzle. It’s not something that should be brought down to a level where you start making people look for solutions to it. Obviously people aren’t going to be as impressed when presented with a puzzle that they cannot solve. It’s frustrating. Don’t trivialize it. Aim to impart awe. I guess I’ll conclude this rant now.

Peace.

>> Attitudes, emotions and clarity

Posted in General on January 17, 2008 by AJ

Alright - I’ve finally gotten down to this. Thought of starting on the new year but stuff came up. Started again a week later but then more stuff came up. Hopefully stuff stops coming up atleast until I finish this first post!

Why is the world so mean? I come across so many people everyday and the attitude that many portray is pretty disheartening. From the smallest of things. For example while waiting in line for lunch, Does anyone really care about the person behind them? I really don’t think so - take the ladle, put in whatever you want and ditch it back into the basin of liquid. And make sure it submerges completely. There ya go, made my day! Would take maybe a few extra seconds to just hand it over or keep it held for the person behind you. I personally always try to pass it on. How many of us actually hold open a door for someone behind us? How many doors do we go through every day? I go through quite a few and try my best to help out someone everyday. If not directly, indirectly. Sometimes, all you need to do is smile. It can do loads.There’s absolutely nothing wrong in offering help and it feels great to do it as well. So why do people hardly do it or care for others’ feelings? I really am not sure - ask yourself the question. A person’s attitude means a whole lot to me.

I handle so many people online everyday and although it’s difficult to convey real emotions and thoughts with clarity through the internet, it definitely provides a very interesting perspective. I love chatting and getting to know people. Sometimes typing is so much better than actually talking. Not always but sometimes. You have time to think and put down your thoughts and you can say things that you may not really say in real speech. Not because it’s not appropriate but maybe because you aren’t very comfortable with it. There are a few things that I may never actually use in oral conversation but use plenty while writing and chatting. There is more clarity and less inhibition to type out something and press the ‘enter’ button. I’ve gotten to know people better through this quite a bit. And in turn I think people have also gotten to know me a bit better in the same way. Unfortunately it’s also an excellent mask. You can really show that you are in a different state of emotions when you aren’t quite. It takes a bit of work to look through such things but it’s definitely possible for the experienced. I don’t consider myself an expert or anything in the area of ‘reading people online’ but since I work at a very large forum on a daily basis, it’s one of the essential skills that are needed. Looking into a post, reading between the lines, stopping arguments from brewing, enforcing rules, et al. Which is why I try to express my thoughts as well as emotions when I write something.

Seems like I’ve deviated a bit from nowhere into a new nowhere. I feel most of my posts are going to be like this. Some kind of vision, ideas, random venting and relaxation in my online haven.

For some reason I am looking more deeply into stuff. I’ve been trying out a lotta new things and rarely share thoughts with anyone these days. For the simple reasons that I neither find it necessary or just cannot put my trust on someone. This isn’t going to be my place to vent of course! I think I’ll conclude this first blog post with this. Much more to continue . . .

Peace.